TALKIN TO THE WALLS 101

Behind the walls you will find cashiers who are too distracted to ring up your purchase correctly, give you the correct change, or remember or concede to saying thank you.

Behind the walls you will find young black and latino men who are too gangsta to be respectful or too cool to be considerate.

Behind the walls you will find preachers who are too antiseptic to risk becoming contaminated by feeding the flock and and who are too forgetful to be empathetic.

Behind the walls leaders strategize against followers, oblivious to the inevitable irony that ensues from creating neutralized and emasculated subordinates.

Behind the walls leaders follow followers.

Behind the walls incompetence is the court jester and is given center stage to juggle sensitive and delicate valuables.

Behind the walls some pay with their lives so that others might not be slightly inconvenienced.

Behind the walls the majority is right even when it's wrong.

Behind the walls weak and vulnerable beliefs generate a motivation to suppress all other ideas.

Behind the walls there are men who prefer sex with men but who think that they're something other than gay.

Behind the walls "masculine" men think they're "better" than feminine men.

Those behind these walls see no wall at all. If you see these walls, then talk to them. For it's by the affirmation of their existence that these walls will begin to crumble.

IS YOUR REPRESENTATIVE A WUSS?

(One boogie man's perspective)

Do you, your friends, neighbors, and pets have more to say about the treasonous behavior of the commander in chief than your congressmen and senators? We now know that the presidents' inaction upon the revelation of top aides' involvement in the outing of a C.I.A. agent was due to his own complicity and sponsorship of their illegal activities. But that kind of begs the question of whether or not other national elected officials were also complicit. Only a few seem to be saying very much on the topic.

Well that's all water under the bridge. Or so you would think, by our representatives' amnesia. I've attempted to find out from my congressman where this issue falls on his priority list, and if it's not at the top or near the top, what's more important than dealing with a murderous traitor who's running the country. But as with every other time I've tried to contact representative Chaka Fattah, I've gotten zero feed back. See if you can twist an answer out of your rep: http://www.house.gov/ . I would have attempted to query the senators from Pennsylvania, but for the fact that I can imagine those two combating over which is next in line to lick the president's testicles, assuming they aren't as imaginary as Iraq's WMD's.

If your representative is shaking in the shadows of the Bush Administration, then he or she needs to be reminded that we the people also pay Bush's salary and that collectively we are the real boogie man.

Paralysis of fear and ignorance

Like stunned deer watching rapidly approaching headlights, America stands immobilized by the confused, yet persistent onslaught of its tyrannical dictator. Many or those not caught up in the headlights, idly watch the scene play out, having been duped into believing some version of the absurd notion that conscious, voluntary inflicting of pain and suffering upon the masses will one day have some medicinal effect(trickle down?). [If I hurt you now we'll all be better off in the future] In the absence of real rhyme or reason, the tyrant, with impunity and no remorse, ravages the land and the people. Ironically because of fear (of what is already being done to them) and the inability to grasp the big picture, the victims cooperate with abusers.

I'm really starting to wonder though, if none of the people we are attracted to is the right one. Do you suppose there's some undiscovered law that guarantees that those you are attracted to will be a mismatch, if not immediately, then eventually? Maybe we should pursue those we're not attracted to? Really starting to wonder.

Beyond Crisis Management
(An indictment against immediate gratification)

Starting the year 2006 with an average murder rate of greater than one per day in the city of brotherly love, there's little debate about whether or not something drastic is needed in Philadelphia to address this problem of raging murders.
So I can not be critical of Mayor Street for contemplating a request for assistance from the PA State Troopers and the PA National Guard in this effort. This is a response to the realization that past measures have not been effective in controlling the murder rate. Another way of putting this is that everything that has been tried in the past has failed. Unfortunately, sending in "the troops" is a measure that says you can get what you want through force or the threat of force. If this is the only response that were to receive serious effort and funding then we essentially disqualify ourselves as honest advocates of non-violence, anger management, conflict resolution, etc. It would be completely hypocritical, but, sadly typical for us to publicly and financially abandon precepts that we try to instill in the youth. Incidentally, because the vast majority of these murders that have constituted this crisis were unlikely a part of any organized affront, it's unclear how the presence of the guard or state troopers could be expected to impact the problem in a positive way. But, understandably, something has to be done

There must be a recognition across the board that the real problems are ignorance, ineffective communication, and a love for immediate gratification. The perpetrators of violent crimes have surrendered to the idea that they are incapable of achieving their goal(s) by other means and they do not have the patience to explore other options. Government officials routinely set poor examples when it comes to resolving conflict.Countries go to war primarily due to the ineptitude of their leaders. Unless a country or a person is acting in self defense, then violence is an admission of inadequacy. It says that the victims' power over the perpetrator is so great that the victims' existence detracts from the perpetrators' existence.
I do understand that something has to be done. But I suggest that while we are in crisis mode we take advantage of an opportunity to amass support for attacking the underlying causes of these manifestations of ineptitude and hopelessness. While the shadow of these tragedies looms overhead let's take advantage of the momentum that they have spawned. As potential victims of senseless crime, perhaps we should all focus our imaginations on a day when crime prevention is actually focused on preventing crime as opposed to dealing with suspects, perpetrators, and convicts. In order for that to happen we will have to address the ignorance that limits the arsenal of many people for dealing with conflicts. We will also need to address the affinity for immediate solutions to complex questions.

There are hotlines for people who are contemplating suicide, people relapsing into drug abuse or thinking about it, and for women who decide that they don't want there newborn infants. Is there a hotline for a person to call when they're hotter than the line and angry enough to be contemplating a violent resolution to a problem that is obviously resolvable by other means? If so, is there adequate funding given to this preventative tool, comparable to say the "safe streets" project, which incidentally, I'm in favor of? And, if there is, are people aware of its existence?

There are numerous measures that could be implemented that would address a culture of crime as opposed to apprehension of those who've already perpetrated offenses and smoke and mirrors "tough on crime" penalties. District attorney Lynn Abraham surprised me by acknowledging that law enforcement alone cannot resolve these issues. I applaud her for stating that on at least two occasions. But it's time for lawmakers to catch on to this and really run with it aggressively. If leaders are not proactive about addressing fundamental causal factors, then who's expected to step up? Cries for more police are cries of surrender!

Today I was propositioned by a person seeking DL men to interview for a book he's in the process of writing. I could have just said no, like the anti-drug slogan. But why just say no? Why waste the opportunity to add a reason? Well the door was openened and the following is my reply:

Thanks for opening up the opportunity for me to let you know that I absolutely do not fit the type you're looking for. Being DL is a selfdeprecatory, self-defeating phenomenon. It disgusts me to the core that people would limit where they go, who they associate with, and whose alliance they have in order to appease a segment of the population that hates their guts. The DL population promotes and supports people in power (politicians, preachers, etc), who, many times, might very well be getting theirs in privately, while publicly supporting policies that slowly detract from the ability of gays and lesbians right to live in peace. When I think of DL men, I visualize an undercover homosexual standing idly while he observes a fatal gay bashing. That's just what comes to my mind.

So the moral of the story is, don't come at me for an interview too early in the morning. Just kidding. Now I don't live in a vacuum. I know that there are numerous reasons that men choose to live on the low. But underlying each of these reasons is cowardice. This fact should at least be acknowledged. Instead being DL is insanely viewed as a badge of honor in some circles of the gay community. This is ironic since it is actually the epitome of acquiescence to shame. Unfortunately, the DL phenomenon, in my opinion, threatens to usher the gay community in a regressive march towards a time when homosexuals were treated much worse.

I'm also aware of the marketability of the topic these days. I can't blame a person for trying to make a buck. But capitalizing on a groups' mass neurosis or psychosis seems to me a bit sinister. It's true to say that the DL phenomenon is what it is, so writing about it or doing third rate flicks about it is merely telling the story. But it's not telling the entire story and it's doing nothing to mitigate the unfortunate status quo. Keeping who you are under wraps, makes it easier for those so inclined to continue making your life miserable. Your co worker might not be so frivolous with anti-gay rhetoric, or anecdotes, if he or she knew that the supervisor is gay. But the sup is on the low. And the straight supervisor might not be so tolerant of inappropriate anti-gay slurs if he knew that his son's gay or that his manager's gay. One may never know because for the time being it's "to the rear MARCHING" towards oppression and silence to the beat of a self perpetuating drum of defeat.

These are the words I imagined my departed friend speaking to me in his usual upbeat, motivational speaker tone: "Whassup big man? Don't cry! Be tough. Be tough for my little sister"

Though we drifted apart we were still in each other's hearts. As I embraced his sister to comfort her in her grief, she imparted words that embraced and comforted me. She whispered "you know he loved you very much" A million doves flew out of me carrying little pieces of the hurt. Simultaneously, there was an awkwardness that was clearly the result of he and I having drifted apart.

The moral of this series is don't be taken aback if I should hug you and tell you that I love you. My soul can not endure too many more "if only's" or "what if's". Instead, I hope that you will feel complemented by my desire to be close to you.

When have you last taken in the ocean, the mountains, or a forest? When have you last deeply inhaled a fulfilling friendship or relationship? These are things that you must savor or you will risk forgetting to live. Life is to be lived today. While we plan for fantastical future days that frequently never materialize we must not forsake or trivialize the present. Accentuate the positive today. No matter how small that positive thing is, amplify it as absurdly as you like to the point that it drowns out the negative. It's your prerogative. It's your day. Love it no less than you love the vision that you've created for the future.

If you're gonna blog, how could you debate with yourself about whether or not to write about the loss of one of the best friends you've ever had? But that's what I found myself doing. I guess I was thinking that it would be better to wait until I had digested this a little more, since it was only last night that I found out of his death. For years we were white on rice enough for many people to assume that we were brothers or at least cousins. And while I anticipate the concentrated weirdness that's likely to ensue from those trying to untangle the conundrum they've created by making assumptions instead of asking questions, I would be aggravating my own personal drama if I failed to offer my condolences to his mother and sister.

I guess anyone who's lost someone who was close has experienced the regret of not having said this or that. Well over the 31 years that we knew each other, I think we said quite a bit to each other. And although I have this feeling that we were a few thousand conversations in arrears, I'm happy to have had those that we did have. It's rare when you meet a person with whom no topic of conversation is off limits. It's a shame that we allowed life to slowly seep in to separate us. It happens all the time though. Mounting responsibilities, Time restraints. Finances, competing priorities cause us to distance ourselves from unique situations that have nurtured our expressiveness, imagination, and humanity. Because we voluntarily choose bricks and stones over love and spirituality, we miss invaluable experiences and insights that causes material things to pale in comparison. More often than not we're not very fond of the path to those things we want to accumulate and once we've reached the pinnacle and experience the accompanying anticlimactic fizzle, depression often follows as we realize that those things are not satisfying.

BOOBY TRAPS!!

I'm sure that this post will have the best chance so far of pissing someone off and or making someone turn on me, but it's my truth. You'll get over it. And by the way if this one upsets you or your stomach then please do tune in again for further posts. In my humble opinion I'm only abrasive to those who have rough edges that need smoothing down.

I'm very hopeful that all who might read this will take or have taken sufficient caution not to fall into any of the booby traps out there waiting around the new year. You may be right in thinking that having a little buzz has an insignificant impact on your ability to operate your vehicle, but you're not right if you think that it's not enough to land you in jail with a DUI. For many of us a DUI translates into looking for another job sooner than planned. If you're one of us who has found that finding a job out here is easier said than done, imagine how you will have exacerbated that situation by sporting a DUI, arrest, and jail time.

I did call them booby traps, and that is really what I want to focus on. There are countless and growing ways for "good", hard working, law abiding citizens to acquire a criminal record these days. If you're not aware of this, then please just take my word for it. You don't have to be a bad person to get jail time. A simple mistake, an oversight, or a misjudgment can lead to the shock of your life. You do have to watch your step constantly. You do have to step gingerly. And you do have to be guarded about certain of your affairs and associations.

I'm guessing that I haven't lost too many of you yet. But hang on. It's coming. But first consider this. Forget the DUI thing. You know the deal with that. If you plan to drink and drive you're gambling with disaster. But what about all of the youngins and not so youngins out there driving without insurance, driver licenses, or proper registration. Foolish you say? Well ultimately that's probably true in most cases. But consider those who have these infractions who must drive to get back and forth to work. What about SEPTA( South Eastern Pennsylvania Transit Authority for those not from around these parts)? You don't know SEPTA if you think it can be relied upon to get you back and forth to an inconveniently located job with inconvenient hours and lack of flexibility or tolerance for tardiness or missed days. SEPTA is pathetic and for too many people it's not a realistic alternative.

So assuming that these individuals have responsibilities, expenses, and bills that are as unrelenting as most of ours, the pressure is on to drive despite not having all of these things in order. As difficult as it is for the majority of people to find another job, especially one that matches ones expenditures, quitting the job would probably prove to be problematic. Well clearly getting all of the vehicle requirements is the simple answer. And for those who I know personally in this predicament, all very responsible people who have erred in the past and are paying for their mistakes, this is the option of choice. For each of them, however, the magnitude of fines, tickets, etc, etc, is too overwhelming. I've learned that telling them "well just pay the fines, just pay the tickets, just get it registered..." is futile not to mention pretty thoughtless. They chisel away at the fines, which are often relatively monumental. In the interim they run the gauntlet. A broken taillight, a malfunctioning signal light, a breakdown, an accident, a missed stop sign, could all serve as precursors to jail time for these bruthas.

Did I say bruthas? Yeah. I admit that that could be because that's who I associate with predominantly. I admit that I have not done a study or anything resembling one, but from my experience it's bruthas who fall into this predicament the most. Now I'm very skeptical about the notion that bruthas are in violation more. My belief is that bruthas pay the piper more in this and in every other situation in which there is interaction with the (in)justice system in the USA. I don't know a soul who I could ask to loan me $2000 for tickets and fines. $2000 is just a random figure that I tossed out there. I know of people with larger totals than that. I think that the reason bruthas pay the piper more is that they rarely know the right people as is seldom the case with their Caucasian counterparts. If you know the right people, tickets disappear. Fines were never issued. Judgments are stricken or mitigated. I don't know many bruthas who know the right people. I also don't know many bruthas who know people with the spare cash lying around to throw at these trifling nuisances. Everyone may run a gauntlet, but the gauntlet bruthas run is lethally laden with deadly daggers and spikes. Now it gets a little uglier. . .

I won't completely lay out my outlook on things in this blog (not intentionally at least). But this will undoubtedly give you a window into my perspective. Booby traps hinder the progress of the adversary. Tactically placed, they hinder significant progress and effectively eliminate any possibility of momentum being built up. Now of course they have the potential to annihilate the individual who's unfortunate enough to stumble upon it. But accumulatively, each individual's demise or neutralization has an overall potentially crippling effect on the group.

Skipping to the end now. When you come across bruthas who do time in jail(horrifying), get a record resulting from relatively petty violations, and who drastically reduce their ability to compete in the job market, I want you to think booby trap. Don't focus so much on the individual scenarios. Don't get into analyzing the thought processes of the individuals. By doing so you miss the big picture. Although it is indeed the individual who falls into the trap, the setting of these traps is strategic. It helps to maintain the status quo. It serves the purpose of hindering the progress of oppressed groups. It maintains an uneven playing field. This is indeed a conspiracy theory. But I'm convinced that the architects of this conspiracy have enough self perpetuating instruments in place so that keeping the wheels turning does not require the players to be cognizant of their roles. Consequently many who are guilty of making this disparity possible are inclined to throw you an honest stupid look. In order to ever be able to grasp this it will be necessary to dispense with searching for intentions and focus instead on causes and effects.

Okay this is all relatively new for me. Fortunately, right off the bat I came across two stellar bloggers that made me immediately recognize what all the hype is about. Marz is a prolific young writer who spares no words. Incisive and obviously comfortable writing on any topic, he's already a writer. If he's not published, then dagnabbit, he should be. Marz, hopefully, one day you'll turn over in bed and decide that you want to change the world. I've known you for what 3 days? Already convinced that you have what it takes to do that. The few posts of D-place have been sufficient to re-introduce me to an artistic side of myself that I've apparently allowed life to gradually siphon away. I'm ecstatic about the possibilities, the newness. This has been like a rebirth, and I've undoubtedly just scratched the surface. Wow! Just felt like shouting.

It's about free and relaxed communication. Being exposed to expression in which the thing that is thought is the thing that is said or written is refreshing beyond words. I feel like I'm hooked. And that's rarely a good thing. In this case I think is a great thing.

The "Religious" Right

Why are they so WRONG?

IMHO evangelicals should practice leading by example, ie practicing the following scripture: Matt 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Instead what we see is doomed for failure attempts at coercion and manipulation of laws. They have become blatant in their expressions of hatred for various groups and individuals. Terribly ironic, since the one who they purport to follow, Jesus Christ, did not even hate the ones who betrayed him. If one disregards the hypocritical rhetoric proceeding from the mouths of their leaders, it will be evident that the agenda of the religious right is one of promoting hatred and discord. Just check out Pope Pat Robertsons' quote: "Christianity needs an image makeover," Robertson continued. "No more of that simpering, turn-the-other-cheek stuff. I like the kick-butt, take-no-prisoners approach popularized by the Spanish inquisitors. Now, they knew how to be tough!"

That thinking and attitude appear to me to be diametric to those of Jesus.

Well there should be no doubt that I'm not a big fan of the Christian Confused nor the Religious Ridiculous movements. They have no intention of adhering to the Bible, the basis of Christianity, only asserting their will through political means, and selectively legislating their misinterpretations of the Bible. Despite my bias, due almost entirely to their hypocrisy, I'm confident that if they even picked just one testament of the Bible and practiced it uniformly, they would gain my respect though, most likely not my allegiance.

I won't be holding my breath for that event to occur.

Ye Olde Progressive Bloge: Entitlement Programs: a policy of victimization

Ye Olde Progressive Bloge: A Day Late and a Dollar Short?

Justus 

Check this out. This cool, intelligent youngin peaked my interest enough to get me to try this.

My Teenage Years: HEAD CUTTING